Letters to Alaska
by Uwa-ah Chan
Summary: So, I got sent to boardom school! I need letters cus i'm bored!  Rated T for possible language   OC's welcome
1. Dear World

Hey there everyone! It's me, Alaska! I'm super bored. Oh did I metion I got sent to boarding school for pushing Virginia down a large muddy hill! Not cool! Anyway I need some letters to pass the time here! They won't even let my pet polar bear that Uncle Canada gave me on campus! Her name is Kleftanie! Cute right? Okay so please write me! I'm so bored! Byesss

~Anastasia

~Alask


	2. Dear Alaska: Virginia1

**Dear Anastasia,**

**Yes, I remember that. You completely ruined my suit, you trottel. And this is**

**exactly what you deserve for being so inconsiderate of other people. Gott im**

**Himmel...**

**Anyway, how is the school Vater chose? I hope it meets expectations.**

**Write back soon, ja?**

**Sincerely,**

**Thomas Bielschmidt Jones**

**The Commonwealth of Virginia**

**Post Scriptum: I have enclosed the receipt for a replacement suit in my**

**letter. I trust you will /pay it promptly./**

Dear Stick-In-The-Mud,

You were the one in the way of my winning roll! Plus, I can be considerate is I want to! The school is SHIT! Some bitch broke my nose! It'll never be the same. I am writing back! ROFLZ! Do you think dad has a grudge against me or something?

With fun,

Anatasia Jones

Alaska

P.S. Why do I have to pay it! I didn't mean it! Plus you owe me for that time you /broke/ my leg!


	3. Dear Alaska: New Jersey1

**Dear Alaska,**

**I love you so freaking much for the whole Virginia thing sis! Oh, By the way**

**this is New Jersey, your awesome brother. Sorry you got sent to boarding**

**school! I once had to spend a year in boarding school... I won't lie to you,**

**it was hell. Stay strong sis!**

**Your best brother,**

**New Jersey**

Dear Awesome Brother,

Thanks, it was his fault, he was in the may of my winningness! Yeah, some bitch broke my nose for no reason. I was just minding my own beeswax, when the bitch turned me around and "POW!" in the freaking nose! It was bleeding for hours until my room-mate person decided to take me to the clinic.

With Love,

~Anatasia

~Alaska


	4. Dear Alaska: Hawaii1

**Hey sis,**

**Sorry to hear about the boarding school that you were sent to hope things go**

**well. I'm sure that Uncle Matt will take care of Kleftanie for you. Oh when**

**your out of the school would you like to come down by me and have some fun!**

**Your little sister,**

**Kanani**

**Hawaii**

Dear Funner-Than-Virginia,

Thanks! They haven't gone well so far, I got my nose broken! I surly hope he will take care of her! At least it'll be him and not dad, who would feed him hamburgers and make the poor girl fat! I really hope dad'll let me come down. This place is just horrible!

~Anastasia

~Alaska


	5. Dear Alaska: New Jersey2

**Dear Sis,**

**Someone had to do it! Now, if only it could have been new york...**

**Aww, that bastard! I would come over and show him what happens when you mess**

**with my sis, but I'm currently grounded, and the door is locked. Dad barred**

**the windows to, so its gonna be hard to escape. But when i do, that guy can**

**expect the full wrath of my fists!**

**Your best brother,**

**New Jersey**

**P.S I Enclosed some sweets with the letter, if i remember that school didn't**

**look to nicely upon anything sugary.**

Dear Best-Brother-Ever,

Yeah! Totally! Dude, awesome! There's only one problem. The bastard is from Germany, so have fun getting past that scary guy! HF, what got you stuck in your room THAT protected! I swear, dad has a grudge against some of us!

~Anastasia

~Alaska

P.S. Thanks! They don't have anything that is not bound to give me food poisoning here! Once again, Thanks


	6. Dear Alaska: Virginia2

**Dear Anastasia,**

**It does not make a verdammt bit of difference! I could have been in the way of**

**the King of England und it would still have been totally unacceptable! *End**

**Germany-esque rant***

**What? This will not stand. I am coming out there right away, und bringing mein**

**rifle with me.**

**Nein. What you did required firm action.**

**Sincerely,**

**Thomas Bielschmidt Jones**

**The Commonwealth of Virginia**

**Post Scriptum:It. Does. Not. Make. A. VERDAMMT. Bit. Of. DIFFERENCE! I expect**

**the money promptly, do you hear me?**

Dear Bigger-Stick-In-The-Mud,

I MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE! I could have lost to the perverts daughter! Who happened to try to look under my skirt that time Paris pushed him in the shark tank! Sorry! I'm ranting!

YAY! KILL HER! YAY!

Idk, he sent me here, all I did was push you, I've done worse. Like that time I blew up Iowa's bathroom. She put poor Cali in a coma!

Funner-Than-You,

~Anastasia

~Alaska

P.S. Fine I'll give you the money, but I can't get it to you that fast! I need to make arrangements, you know I'm saving up for that Super Soaker 20000!


	7. Dear Alaska: Illinois1

**Yo,**

**Its me. Ricky. Err, Illinois. Anyway, its been a while since I've seen ya'.**

**So... How's things up at your place, or whatever?**

**Peace out,**

Dear Professor ill,

Yeah it's been forever! My hands, arms, legs, and feet are numb because that slut of a sister Alabama decided it would be funny to steal my coat and throw me in the snow.

Freezing. I have a huge bowl of snow that I'm eating, even though I'm cold and numb.

Love and snow,

-Anastasia-

~Alaska


	8. Dear Alaska: Virginia3

**Dear Anastasia,**

**I am going to ignore the verdammt names, because I have something very**

**important to say to you:**

**GROW THE VERDAMMT HOLLE UP, YOU TROTTEL!**

**I honestly do not give a damn what could have happened, you were acting like a**

**complete child, und somebody could have been seriously hurt. You are very**

**lucky I was not carrying a weapon, or I would have shot you, purely on**

**priciple, do you hear me?**

**I am not going to kill anybody, I am simply going to warn her that assaulting**

**mein Geschwestern is something for which I will not stand.**

**Ja. I remember that, und I was severely disappointed he did not take action**

**then. You are very fortunate Vater has been so lenient with the lot of you.**

**Sincerely,**

**Thomas Bielschmidt Jones**

**The Commonwealth of Virginia**

**Post Scriptum: Gut. Und I do not care what you are saving up for, just get me**

**my verdammt money! On another note, when you make that purchase, if it is**

**fired at me, you will be very, very sorry.**

Thomas,

I-I'm sorry….I didn't mean to make you angry, big brother…It'll never happen again, I swear!

Yes…..loud and clear…

A-alright.

I guess I have…..well, um...maybe you- you could visit sometime…...My room-mate got sent back home...

Love,

~Anastasia~

~Alaska~

P.S. Okay. I can wait, the money is enclosed in this letter. I swear, it will not even be attempted to be fired at you.


	9. Dear Alaska: Virgina4

**Dear Anastasia,**

**Gut. Und I am sorry for frightening you, but I felt it was the only way to get  
>my point across. Do try to think before you act in the future, alright?<strong>

**Again, I am sorry for frightening you like this, schwester.**

**Ja, I will come visit you as soon as I can.**

**Sincerely,**

**Thomas Bielschmidt Jones**

**The Commonwealth of Virginia**

**Post Scriptum: Danke. Und I have sent a package with this letter. Use it  
>wisely.<strong>

****Dear big brother,

That's okay. I'm usually easily scared anyway. And I will try.

Yay!

Love,

~Anastasia~

-Alaska-

P.S. No. Way. YOU GOT ME THE SUPER SOAKER 20000! THANK YOU, THANK YOU , THANK YOU!


End file.
